In Which I Am Too Dumb to Function

I don't know what the hell is going on, but my memory is just like, gone. I was up at like, 3am on Monday morning, and I was so unsure of what day it was, I was starting to panic. I know it's common to be a little messed up on around federal holidays, but still. I'm also literally forgetting things almost immediately, like my neighbors name (sort of understandable b/c I was all anxiety-awkward panicky) but I'll forget the answer to a question I just asked my kids, which is not like me. I feel flighty and forgetful and unfocused--UNABLE to focus.
My nerdspaper arrived yesterday, FINALLY, and I just couldn't even with it. I just couldn't focus. I did a couple of the puzzles over several hours, but I'm just not into it like I usually am.

Also, the puzzles are REALLY DIFFICULT. Like, I don't even know what they're asking for. And I can't focus, so I'm just like derpy derpy durr durr... just gonna stare blankly at the... something, I don't even know at this point.

This was an easy puzzle. At least, one part of it was. The other part made very little sense, and I can't figure out the last bit at all.

In other news, the pirate thing I ordered for Marv is going over pretty well, after an initial hiccup. The first mailing arrived last Friday and she was NOT into it, and I was ready to light myself on fire.

Mailing #1

She had no interest in the letters or the cipher, and only wanted the key. Fucking kill me.

Luckily, the first mailing had trouble crossing the border or something, so the second mailing came the next day. Oh, also, and I know I could totally insert this bit in the appropriate place (heh) but whatever. When the first mailing came, Struggs was all like, 'oh, yeah Marv, me & OD didn't want to do this, so Mom got it for you,' and I'm like, STFU, Struggs, that's not even what happened, and don't make this seem like a punishment, it's meant to be fun, you asshole. (That's what all led to me putting my head in the oven. I was unusually delicate that day or something.) ANYWAY, the second mailing came, and guess who suddenly wanted to be involved?

If this were an actual publication, I'd subscribe immediately.

That's right, fuckin' Struggs all up in the jam. Considering they spend the majority of their time arguing, this melted my obsidian heart a little bit. 

Which leads me to my final point:

I hate ventriloquists.